Contemptuous Familiarity - Not So Much

I just got back from a morning trip to my old neck of the woods - about an hour’s drive from our current community. We relocated about four years ago after living there for more than 20 years! I actually get back there every other week to meet with my friends over coffee - something we have done for about 15 years.

On my triathlon training schedule for the day was a mountain bike ride. I love doing these but don’t get to do that very often anymore. Before I shifted my focus to triathlons, I used to ride the trails I rode today almost everyday. Those trails are so great... I miss them a lot. They were so familiar; even though I had forgotten some of the particulars of the trails, my memory of the terrain, the corners, the climbs, and descents kicked in. It was great fun!

To my surprise, there was a new trail that spurred off from my old trail. It was a pleasant surprise! I had no idea what to expect. I pretty much knew where I was, but I had no idea what fun and challenges lurked around each corner or at the top of each climb. It was familiar but completely new.

Eventually the new trail intersected back to my old trail. I wasn’t at all disappointed because I still love the old trail. Then another gift! Right when the trail was about to end at a road, another new trail intersection appeared. It was divine. It extended my ride into totally new terrain - again! The fun-factor increased even more.

As I was riding, I was thinking about my friends that I had just spent time with. They were the reason I had trekked over to my old neck of the woods. It was our first meet-up of 2021. We caught up on miscellaneous middle-aged-men stuff, made jokes, and enjoyed each other’s company. As our time was winding down, I asked a question about any thoughts or goals my friends had going into the new year. I was trying to avoid the word “resolutions” since I think we should make a change any day we agree to making one. We each shared a couple of things we hoped for ourselves, our families, and our jobs. As we walked braver and stronger together, I noticed a few things:

• All of our goals were seeded in things already in our lives.

  • We started from “old trails” and were trekking onto “new spurs”.

• We each were enthusiastic about each other’s goals.

  • There were no competitions or comparisons.

• The new things we wanted were achievable.

  • They weren’t totally new, so we each had existing resources to help reach them.

• The new things we wanted were sustainable.

  • Because they were seeded in things already present, they required only a slight reallocation and would not take a lot of new resources to move forward.

We left encouraged by the familiar and excited about some new things we wanted in our lives this year.

Sometimes we might think adding new goals to our lives is too much and too hard. It doesn't have to be. Start with what is already there and watch for a way to jut out onto a “new trail”. And do it with some friends who know you and care about your life and goals.

Happy 2021!

#resolutions #newyeargoals #startfresh #familiaritydoesnthavetobreedcontempt #familiaritybreedsprogress